#i just associate him with will wood tbh

[wisteriagoesvroom]

LOL I can imagine for vampire au Lando starting to third wheel Carcar and so even though turning Franco is a complete accident he can’t feel too guilty bc he uses it as an excuse to hang around someone else, and somehow he learns more about vampirism lore through a human grad student than he’s learned in his whole life (he’s lived a long time, lots of info to absorb). Then also, if you don’t mind my ask, what do they all do for jobs/how do they get money and would Franco keep studying ?

HELP this is so cute. ok. norpinto-frando vampire au for those who aren't up to speed...

Lando starting to third wheel Carcar and so even though turning Franco is a complete accident, [Lando] can’t feel too guilty bc he uses it as an excuse to hang around someone else -> screaming cus, absolutely. random associated headcanons for this... i'll rewind a bit:

carlos is the oldest vampire, like, moorish/medieval era. he met lando while they were both at a masquerade ball in the early 1600s and smelled each other right away (carlos like wood and ink, lando like gas lamps and wet stone).

lando is an tudor era vampire. like he actually knew shakespeare and said he was one of the best viral marketers of the era

oscar was turned in the early days of the australian penal colony, he's like first or second generation white australian but he refuses to be called british. he moved in to the house because the rent was cheap and he doesn't feel the need to live extravagantly -- even though he, too, is $$ loaded $$

oscar didn't move in until about two decades ago - very short by vampire standards, to them it feels like yesterday - but carlos and oscar are basically They Were Roommates atp even though they squabble con-stant-ly

their neighbours think they are a new age-y polyam group but because the people who live opposite them are students, nobody ever hangs around longer than a year to remember them or dig deeper

so franco definitely brings a fun funky fresh dynamic

he learns more about vampirism lore through a human grad student than he’s learned in his whole life (he’s lived a long time, lots of info to absorb) -> things that baby vamp!franco teaches lando include

tiktok trends, like how to make ur teeth comically large in photos. lando finds this hilarious

how to use venmo

creating a roster on google docs for who needs to do what house chores

jailbreaking an apple watch so it doesn't read their pulses (they don't have any), but it will remind them of the moon phases and when they might be extra hungry to feed

at one point franco actually puts his academic skills to use and helps lando hunt down some of his family tree, because since lando was turned and it's been so long, he doesn't remember much about them : ( so one of franco's little gifts to lando is helping him trace his heritage

what do they all do for jobs/how do they get money and would Franco keep studying ? -> i love how practical-minded you are. um well let's say this fictional supernatural creatures' market mostly runs on barter trades and goodwill agreements. the entire house sometimes just gets lazy tbh so lando or carlos will just dig into one of the old chests of random shit and pull out an antique and go: "do we think this is worth anything?" then they take it to an antiques dealer who is also a mage (alex albon) and there is a 1 in 25 chance that the antique is actually is worth something, so that bankrolls them for another half a year or whatever.

carlos makes a lot of noise about being "an art dealer" just because he sold a goya painting to a museum once.

oscar is a man of industry, of the "newer" world (australia) etc etc so he spent the 80s and 90s learning C++ and Java and Python so he legit just codes for a living. or when he feels like it. oscar has helped launch at least a dozen startups under various pseudonyms and one of them is even a blue chip company by now. he doesn't do it for money tho. he just does it cus he likes a challenge, and otherwise fights with carlos too much. when he isn't coding he likes to tinker and fix things just for fun. like, he legit knows how to fix a boiler and stuff. his familiar is definitely a grumpy orange neighbourhood cat.

franco keeps studying!! he is such a nerd that he's like "i can totally learn everything about anything now, and i could in theory do like 20 masters degrees, and nobody can stop me"!! then lando is like, "well you might get bored of it after a while or burn out". but franco insists he will not. in fact with his enhanced neurological abilities he goes on an academic bender trying to fast forward through an entire harvard's undergrad degree's worth of material in a week, and he ends up faceplanting on his desk. and then poor lando has to go and find a fresh chicken or something to kill and revive franco 'cus franco wore himself out too fast being a bb vampire with accelerated mind powers.

franco promises never to do that again (but of course he will continue to do it once in a while, and everyone still looks after him in his lil study hangovers because he is so very nice. also he taught them how to use venmo.)

and. one time. franco is like. "i can't find this rare sonnet do you know what library i could maybe locate it in" and lando is like "wait i know that one" and pulls out an honest to god original copy that he at some point got laminated in the early 80s. and franco is like. "um i think this should be in a museum??" and lando is like "yeah but i gave them a copy of this, cus i spilled ink on the corner of this in 1603 after a really good night out" and franco is like "???? ok ????"

then lando swans off to moodily stare at the moon or some shit.

[verecunda]

"Radagast is, of course, a worthy Wizard, a master of shapes and changes of hue..."

I'm mildly obsessed with this throwaway remark from Gandalf. Like his fellow Istari, Radagast is a Maia in origin, and the only other Maia who is singled out for their shapeshifting ability is Sauron. Radagast is potentially a shapeshifter on a par with bloody Sauron, and this is just never. mentioned. again. Amazing.

(tbh I'm not entirely sure what makes their ability stand out, since all the Ainur seem capable of changing their forms, unless, like Melkor, their power is depleted in a big way. Even Olórin/Gandalf is mentioned as changing his shape in the Silmarillion. But that's another musing for another time...)

But to return to Radagast and Sauron: I wonder if there's any difference in their approach to shapeshifting. On a headcanon level, I tend to associate Sauron's ability with his smithing - he's crafting himself a new form. Maybe for Radagast, as a Maia of Yavanna, his ability is closer to examples from the natural world, like animal camouflage and call mimicry.

And is there maybe a link to the Beornings, too? Beorn seems to know him - "Not a bad fellow, as wizards go". What if it was Radagast who first showed his people how to change their shape - whether that was teaching Men how to turn into bears, or teaching bears how to turn into Men?

Just frankly obsessed with the idea that Radagast has these powers that could potentially make him a match for the Dark Lord himself, but he'd rather just be chilling in the woods, chatting to the birds.

[potato-lord-but-not]

youll never guess who’s here to ramble about stickers and kayne,,, its me if you didnt guess

I GOT MY STICKERSSASZASAASSSSSSSSSSSS HEHEHHE 💥💥💥💥 honestly fading out of both my will wood AND my mapevolent interests tbh, its very scary fr. somebody force me to catch up with malevolent lie to me and say there is kayne screentime in the recent episodes please i desperately need motivation.

THIS POSTER. OHHH LORDDDDD. ITS SO GOOD?? LIKE ITS ACTUALLY STABBING ME IN MY KIDNEY WAY TOO MANY TIMES?? IT ALSO STABBED ME IN THE LUNGS AND NOW MY LUNGS ARE FILLING WITH GAY BLOOD?? like to this day im still embarrassed about my IMPROPER reaction when i first saw it and i have some defenses right, firstly i was at work when i first saw it and then i forgot about it for awhile then when i saw it i was like just insanely tired i think. BUT LORDDYYY HES SO GORGEOUS HELLOOOO man ive always wanted to be arthur real 💞 i mean id even trade for johns position aswell. hes sosososo <33 AND ALSO JUST EVERYTHING ABOUT IT?? IM LIKE SWALLOWING THE WEST SIDE AMERICA IM LITERALLY UNDOING THE WESTWARD EXPANSION FOR KAYNE RN 💞💞 ive also just heavily associated kayne with the tower and everytime i see someone talk anout the tower i start roasting the sun over a campfire. this is so epicsauce ive exploded over it everytime ive seen it in your lil top thing with you top posts and stuff ive exploded every time.

WILL WOOOD HELLOOOOO i’ve actually always really loved these drawings so much infact when i first found your instagram page right after i stalked the entire thing you changed your pfp to that yellow will wood one and i rememeber telling my friend that i needed to see the full drawing NEOW. and then you posted it the next day fr. anyways im feeding the lions to the rats over these stickers /pos

KAYNE KAYNE KANE (<- dcu reference??) KAYNE KAYNE KAYNE KAYNE KAYNE KAYNE KAYNE KAYNE KAYNEEE HELLO HIIHIHIHIHII EXPLODES EXPLODES EXPLODES HII. he could have me ngl, i just want to say i could totalllyy survive any obstacle he throws at me real. hes soooo <333 just wow yk just wow like i dont even have the words to explain my lpve for him besides that i will rob as many dinosaur museums as i can and i will preform some type of ritural to bring them all back to life and i will train them all to be apart of my army and then i will storm wherever they keep the nukes i know its somewhere around here and i will fly said nules to the moon and i will explode WITH the moon because i could not live any longer with how much my love for kayne fills up my mind he is all of my thoughts i will actually go boom. he is SO fine wowza 😍😍😍😍

anyways guess who now has a full time job (no longer half a part time) with no taxes to pay yet and the impulsiveness level of a 5 year old with adhd. expect poor decisions to come someday,, someday,,

If y’all’s reactions to your stickers aren’t like this then don’t EVEN with me 💥💥🤚🤚😤😤

real tho glad they made it and I hope the brainworms recover soon <3 also I fear for your bank account

[bernardellinewsagency]

i had ideas for an entire galladay roleswap au that i just. completely forgot about. oh my fucking god. and when i say roleswap i mean *everything* gets swapped.

penacony is a land of elation, the most wonderous entertainment one could ever experience; if you can afford it, that is. it's a land blessed by aha, where you can forget your struggles and even become someone else entirely, if that's what you want. people think the joy associated with it is unceasing, but it's truly only temporary, and aha is fond of violent and chaotic ends for THEIR own amusement, and so gallagher knows people shouldn't rely on THEIR benevolence.

he is who people believe is closest to the elation in penacony. he's not a masked fool, and he hardly acts like how people would expect him to. he's not grandiose or over the top. he's simple, down to earth, but he makes sure everyone's stay is as best it can be, he creates miracles within the dreamscapes, and people view him as someone perhaps specifically chosen to spread joy and happiness to those who visit penacony.

in truth, though, he works for the enigmata, taking on mythus' duty of undoing all that's been set in stone by the likes of the erudition and finality. some people who come to penacony deserve no sympathy, but there are many who come out of desperation, trying to find some hint of a better life, a different life, where they can be happy. it will never last, the elation will always have to fade away eventually, but can't he try to give them a better ending once it does? if he can erase and obfuscate and rewrite enough, can't he change enough circumstances in their lives for the better?

sunday, on the other hand, is now the security officer plotting behind the scenes. halovians are a natural choice for security; the effects of elation can have some negative consequences, and it already has a reputation for inspiring criminals and terrorists across the universe. should someone find themselves straying from the joy they should be feeling and threatening to turn a sweet dream into a nightmare, they can be psychically nudged back into compliance and docility. plus, it's said that this psychic gift also makes halovians themselves immune to elation, or at least better able to ignore its effects, though that's neither confirmed nor denied.

he's still the adoptive son of the "dreammaster", but in a roleswap, gopher wood and mikhail would also be switching roles. the watchmaker would be the more well renowned leader of penacony, with gallagher or micah set to inherit his role if they haven't already. so sunday, still a follower of the order/harmony, is the one who's upset with how penacony is run, how the ideals it was founded upon have been twisted. how someone he looked up to has been forgotten, cast aside, treated like a traitor to penacony.

he may also be a memetic entity or smth. don't worry about it. also yes, this does mean siobhan and robin swap roles. i haven't thought too much about them, but sunday would be the one to "kill" siobhan and robin would unfortunately be relegated to the role of minor character which sucks bc i love her. but i also love siobhan and she deserves to have her time to shine tbh. i think robin and siobhan should be lesbians <3

anyways. dialogue snippet time!!

"people like to say that penacony's head of security is like a dove cause of your appearance, but it turns out you're more of a magpie, isn't that right? a damn thief of a bird, fitting since you're always taking things that aren't yours." "i've never stolen anything from penacony, much less from its leaders. out of the two of us, you're the one who'd know a thing or two about stealing." "me? you'd better watch your tongue, birdie." "you stole my father's legacy, you clipped my wings, you forced me to play this part, now you wish to silence me? how could you not be the one here who knows the most about taking what isn't theirs?" "your father was nothing but a vulture, stealing the scraps from those who actually put in the work and wanting to claim that he helped build penacony from the ground up, and when that didn't work, he didn't hesitate to switch sides. and you're turning out just like him." "impossible. you're impossible, you know that?" "oh, i'm impossible? no, no, i'll tell you what's really impossible. actually being able to spread the order's influence on penacony, that's what's impossible. do you really think that anything could bring penacony and its guests away from the clutches of elation?" "you seem to think so, working ever so diligently as a minion for the enigmata. following in mythus' footsteps as you try to erase the past; your attempts to overturn truth are futile, it's incredible how shortsighted you must be to never once grasp the fact that all your efforts will only ever be in vain." "you seem awfully confident there, little birdie. you think your precious order could do much better? these people, the fools who willingly come here to stake their whole lives on mere entertainment, will never know what order is like- and that's not even touching on the fact your aeon is dead and gone. unless you want to end up just like THEM, i'd suggest you leave now. go, before i have to force you out." "no. no, no, you won't, gallagher. you know why? because the order has just as much a chance of succeeding as the enigmata does. everything that we see here; everything from ourselves to penacony itself, it doesn't actually mean anything at all. because in the grand scheme of things... all that this is is just fate playing a cruel joke on us."

[faerghusfucker]

ok guys i’m almost out for the summer. i’m almost out. just like six more assignments and i’ll be out. in the meantime, MORE LYRICS THAT I LIKE AS 3H CHARACTERS. BEAGLES ADDITION

edelgard:

this is one of my favorite lyrics of all time. me and these fucking dimes bro. song is fake out by fob

hubert:

come on. i couldn’t resist. this is from emo boy by ayesha erotica.

anyway here’s a serious one

song is sleep by mcr

ferdinand:

this took me unreasonably long to figure out. song is snow by ricky montgomery‼️‼️‼️‼️

linhardt:

my poor boy chasing rest that will never find him. song is lysergide daydream by will wood

caspar:

my lovely rebel son is so save rock and roll coded. both the album and the song tbh. i think caspar would love the youngblood chronicles. song is save rock and roll by fob

bernadetta:

this is my favorite ruminating song i have a history with this one. bernie is a ruminator to such an extreme degree so i associate this lyric with her. song is Ive Got A Dark Alley And A Bad Idea That Says You Should Shut Your Mouth (Summer Song) by fob

dorothea:

i don’t know!! just vibes. song is the kids from yesterday by mcr

petra:

how i wish petra could slow down in the game 😭😭😭 she deserves so much better. song is vienna by billy joel

i promise actual good posts will come eventually lol. by like. friday/saturday-ish this terrible past few months will be but a memory and then my blog can be worth looking at again 💀

[marichild]

hi <3 all members of 3H for the ask meme pls <3 (-kavi/blackwaves)

stares at u ur literally evil. bites u tho.

VEIN

favorite thing about them: if I sat here talking about all the things about vein that fascinate me we'd be here forever. so we'll pick the parts that intrigue me the most — how he's oddly principled / his odd sense of responsibility. this post has a good section about it and I'm like. so heartemoji eyes at it forever. the other thing is that he's so hot and owns himself with an easy fluidity like. wow. stares. I'm not ashamed to admit I have eyes—

least favorite thing about them: can't think about anything that'd make me dislike him (or any character tbh) so I'll say: the level of insanity and feralness I wished to see was not achieved within those four episodes (three, really), so I can only put my hands together and pray for more next season. director li haoling I BELIEVE IN YOUUU

favorite line: with my teeth, sunshine thank you for your cooperation, sweetie~

brOTP: considers. does it even count if I say veinxiao. I don't ship them tbh I just think it's fun to throw them at each other just like that occasionally. maybe all the time. roadtripfic my beloved.

OTP: VEINFEI AAAAA VEINFEI CHEWS ON CONCRETE ROLLS OVER AND DIES. shakes. vein and his easy violence and feral dangerousness with everyone vs. his easy fondness and indulgence for xia fei. I'm gonna shut up before this turns into an essay but I'm a veinfei truther 4ever

nOTP: I'm a multishipper forever I don't have this yet </3 the thing is you can bait me into literally anything with the promise of it being interesting—

random headcanon: not random so much as real and true and fundamental to understanding the universe to me. he's transmasc to me 4ever <3

unpopular opinion: he's not actually as mean and jealous as people like to believe. xia fei is the more possessive one in this relationship — while I do think vein is definitely prone to jealousy, I believe that his version is more lowkey and less upfront. he's rational and logical <3

song i associate with them: I keep saying this but fate by enhypen is a veifei song! it's such a came back wrong song wtf

favorite picture of them: SITS DOWN AND WAILS YUYU ANIMATION MEANS SO MUCH TO ME. SOFTVEIN. LOOK AT THE WAY HE LOOKS AT XIA FEI. idgaf if there's no cp tendency here it's canon to me. excuse me while I tear my hair out and wail

XIA FEI

favorite thing about them: the way he can flip the switch between being cute puppy boy to bitchiest fucker you will ever meet. genuinely that's like ninety percent of what draws me to him with no exaggeration. the other ten percent is his pathetic puppy energy with vein

least favorite thing about them: hmm. I don't really have anything to add on that front unfortunately. the more a character sucks the more I'm fond of them truly.

favorite line:

"Unlike some people, I only go for the best, whether it's a project or a connection. Right, laoban?"

immediately cutting to

"I was wrong, I was wrong, I was wrong! I swear I won't do it again 😭😭 I'll control my temper! I'm sorry 😭😭"

brOTP: xiaofei. you gotta understand that nothing brings me greater joy than seeing two hissy kitties bite and scratch at each other metaphorically or not. I love writing these two it genuinely brings me such delight to do so

OTP: [trembles] VEINFEI VEINFEI VE— [is dragged off into the woods screaming]

nOTP: same as last answer to this

random headcanon: demisexual and the activation key is to puppy friend adopt him somehow or do whatever vein did as long as you're vein

unpopular opinion: he's not actually the soft uwu boy this entire fandom seems to think he is 😭 he's smart and deceptive despite wearing his heart on his sleeve — do yall think vein trusted him with spying on shiguang for liu xiao on a whim ... I'm also convinced he knows or at least is distantly aware that vein is doing, well, very many criminal things. don't u adore him ♡

song i associate with them: BITE ME BY ENHYPEN. veifei discord agrees with me. heh.

favorite picture of them: look at him oh my god. have u ever seen someone be scolded and then head patted so gently. I'm obsessed with this entire sequence I think. I'm obsessed with them in general. waugh.

LIU XIAO

favorite thing about them: ughhh do I have to. sighs. I guess if I had to pick to pick it'd be how mean he honestly is. like. he doesn't outright lie to you or insult you but you can tell because he wants you to know. 🙄

least favorite thing about them: fucking adrenaline junkie FREAK I'm never forgiving him for this shit istg

favorite line: how can you be my friend if you don't do this?

brOTP: for reasons stated above, xiaofei ✨️ truly it's so entertaining.

OTP: xiaochen in the very specific and detailed way I think about them forever

nOTP: once again nonexistent anything can be fun if you try ♡

random headcanon: he's enby aroace and horrible at it + in any universe would bite you for using the correct pronouns on him.

unpopular opinion: in the nicest way possible I genuinely don't believe he's a homewrecker or trying to get between veinfei 🙏 he's at best menacing xia fei bc he thinks it's funny how much feifei doesn't like him, and he literally gets along with vein like. nothing indicates otherwise. to begin with he's probably like ?? at veinfei's weird courting rituals anyway tbh

song i associate with them: honestly I got nothing on this genderfuckthing. in a very xiaochen sense I couldddd probably say like. pisces moon by flower face? all my xiaochen related songs are for the band au helpppp

favorite picture of them: sighs. you're not getting an explanation out of me for the first one. I will say that the second one lives rent free in my head because jfc this stupid fucking adrenaline junkie freak is having so much fun here isn't he. wtf is wrong with him forever.

well that was mildly humiliating

[gellavonhamster]

assigning each straw hat pirate a knight of the round table

because I am currently obsessed both with One Piece and Arthuriana; not any kind of serious AU material, just silliness; I Wrote This for Me but You Can Read If You Like

Luffy: Arthur, not due to any similarities in characterization but purely on the functional level - the boy king, the inspirational leader and, as Sun God Nika, a mythical figure believed to return when people need him the most

Zoro: Lancelot, the perfect warrior who embodies that post that's like "it's not my fault that my love language is acts of service and all I know how to do is kill". There is no Queen Guinevere here, so all the undying devotion is aimed at the king instead. Canonically has massive tits. Mihawk is thus implied to be the Lady of the Lake, and I think that's hilarious

Nami: hear me out: Kay. Sharp-tongued, rather cynical, but loyal to a fault to his king/adopted little brother. Nami as part of the Coward Trio vs. Kay being unlucky on quests and generally the butt of the joke. Isn't known to be a great warrior but occupies an important position (navigator vs. seneschal) that keeps the ship/court going. Besides, looking from the opposite direction, I just think Kay deserves to be the hot girl

Usopp: Usopp, sweetie, I'm so sorry, but I gotta say Tristan. Because Tristan is constantly lying about his identity in the most ridiculous manner possible and it somehow works. That part in Le Morte d'Arthur when he's asked what his name is and goes "Tramtrist" and no one suspects a thing even though "Tramtrist" is just "Tristram" with syllables switched around has big Sniper King energy. Also, can't forget the beautiful blonde healer girlfriend

Sanji: oh, that's the easiest one. Gawain. The Maidens' Knight, the ladies' man, a great warrior and one of the king's closest and most trusted men. If you put together Gawain's characterizations from different texts, from SGATGK to Le Morte to the Vulgate & Post-Vulgate to Chrétien de Troyes to everything, you end up with a contradictory character who is simultaneously the best and the worst guy you'll ever meet, which is how I often feel about Sanji, tbh. Would totally fight at a tournament on behalf of a little girl. Has some kind of an epic gay thing with Lancelot

Chopper: Yvain. Son of a sorceress - ah, pardon, a woman of science; associated with animals; known to be nice and kind (the Vulgate Cycle describes him as the one "whose heart will be filled with every kindness"). Occasionally goes insane in the woods (Monster Point), but, like, who doesn't

Robin: try as I might, I can't pull any direct parallels out of my ass, but I do think that narratively she can be seen as kind of a quasi-Mordred. Since her very childhood she was proclaimed to be bad news and expected to eventually cause a catastrophe, but where Mordred, whom no one tries to persuade the prophecy doesn't define him, ends up becoming exactly what he's expected to become, Robin has people who support her and trust her even after witnessing her be the bad guy in the past, so she never becomes the evil others expect her to turn into

Franky: Sagramore the Desirous (or the Unruly, depending on the text/translation) is a big, strong, good-natured knight who probably has low blood sugar needs to have a snack after fighting because otherwise he'll pass out, much like a certain cyborg needs his cola. In the Post-Vulgate, he and Mordred were raised together, which can be linked to Frobin's fates being intertwined since childhood, because I've Connected the Dots (you didn't connect shit)

Brook: I wanted to pick a character of the older generation who nevertheless isn't a mentor figure to Arthur, and I struggle to think of a better option than Pellinore - not the predatory piece of shit in the medieval texts, but the eccentric but loveable old man in Camelot (1967). Brook is also on a quest focused on an extraordinary beast! Only he's not hunting it, he's trying to get back to it because that beast is his friend 🥺

Jinbei: I honestly don't remember if he counts as the Knight of the Round Table, but I am hereby appointing him Ector - Arthur's adoptive father and one of the nicest parental figures in Arthuriana (and probably one of the nicest people in Arthuriana, period). I've also considered Galehaut for the "(partially) non-human ruler who allies himself with Arthur" angle, but that would imply Jinbei/Zoro and I'm not ready to deal with that.

[ladybug-makes-warriors-gay]

Okay I've retyped this a couple times but about your matrillineality and comphet post! I think making them matrillineal could do four things: help family trees, emulate cats "better", deepen Clan culture, and allow for a version of comphet to exist.

Cats tend to disregard fathers in general, so it goes by their actual behavior to ignore it. Say they dont even know and then you dont have to include patrillineal family in trees whatsoever. Track exclusively by whoever gives birth, and have their culture shift to match many matrillinean cultures out there. Sisters of the queen are like second mothers to her kits, and brothers like fathers.

When it comes to the dramas around dads like Tigerclaw and Graystripe, attach some significance to who a cat is bonded with (bonded pairs in cats). Culturally speaking, a cats bonded pair would be very important, so maybe it's a traditional honor they mentor one of a queen's kittens, or maybe it's just the fact they'd be together so often, so the bond extends emotionally from cat to kitten. Obviously Gray and Tiger would miss them as much as they do their pair, as an extension of them.

But tbh when it comes to Tiger and bramble you could just say that he's perceived as a curse on the clan for having trusted tigerclaw, which is why he looks so much like him and comes from his former pair.

When it comes to comphet you could frame it as a social pressure to pair with a tom (especially one without sisters) because otherwise they don't get to have their own kittens. The opposite works to, where a tom is pressured by the desire for kittens to get with a queen.

Also, this would create slightly explicit gender roles, which could explain transness within the Clans more blatantly, too. Not to say girl = mom, but more so that there'd be different associations and expectations, for better or worse. Also just cuz i think its cute, i imagine there'd be fertility rituals in queens since that'd probably be how they frame it when they don't know how actual conception works.

this was all definitely super interesting to consider, thank you so much for the ask!

as for normal cat behavior, honestly i'm not too worried about that, this is a gay rewrite of a book series about magical cats in the woods. however, i do think it would be interesting to focus on siblings of parents in a kit's life, because they are all actively right there, in the clan, almost all of the time. frequently they are not really involved at all with the kits, which doesn't feel realistic. i do want to strengthen the connection between moms and kits as well, especially because of how much the first arc relies on that, as well as customs like the queens not having to say who the father is.

bonded pairs are definitely something i still want to be important in the books, because i still want there to be romance and relationships and such, which is one of my big hesitations with just going ahead and making the clans matrilineal. if i did, then fathers would honestly just disappear or not matter for a lot of things, which i don't think i want. but it would be more interesting and just generally be a cool lens to look at things through, especially queer relationships and gender roles, as you mentioned.

having dads be mentors often would definitely be a cool way to have them be part of their kits' lives, but i think that honestly would put too many male cats as mentors and maybe not leave enough space for female mentors? but that might not be an issue if i have more gay cats and have lineage just be tracked through birthing mothers and not mothers in general. definitely something to give more thought to.

i do quite like the idea of bramblekit being seen as a curse from starclan after tigerclaw leaves thunderclan, which would give more basis to firestar not trusting him and goldenflower's defensiveness. not sure how that would translate to tawnypaw leaving or brambleclaw's whole thing with hawkfrost later (which i do have thoughts on. esp when it comes to him totally ignoring the fact that mothwing is his kin too. maybe they bond over being seen as ill omens about tigerstar, but that would mean that people know tigerstar is their father. things to think about...).

i do think that the setup for the clans would honestly more encourage amatonormativity (the assumption that a central, exclusive, romantic relationship is normal for humans, and is a universally shared goal - definition from aurea) because of the emphasis on kits and having kits for the clan, and that heteronormativity is more of a byproduct of that. honestly i think that this would lead to a lot more donor situations, or queens having kits with someone and then actually having a relationship later with someone else. a lot of cats would also grow up knowing they have to have kits at some point and just default to looking for attraction to the opposite gender, whether that's actually how they feel or not.

the other thing about the clan culture that's kind of connected to that is that you are surrounded by the same people, day in and day out, and the clans in general are quite gossipy. many, many times in the series, we see cats being asked or teased about someone they're interested in or perceived to be interested in, or someone who's interested in them, and there's a lot of pressure to reciprocate other cats' feelings. you also live in a place where it is very hard to get away from others who are pursuing you, or have a breakup and go back to living normal life, because they're still going to be right there. this would honestly put a lot of pressure on everyone to maintain toxic relationships and not explore their preferences or ideas.

would be kinda fun if part of the reason ravenpaw agreed to leave was because he was gay and didn't want to have kits with anyone. honestly i think it would be fun if all three of that crew had crushes on each other, just all at different times. firestar likes graystripe when he's off with silverstream (for maximum drama, obviously). graystripe and ravenpaw like each other when they're little kids together and maybe even play being mates but have grown out of it once they meet firepaw. ravenpaw likes firestar when he first comes to the forest and for a good chunk of them being apprentices together, and firestar is the most oblivious cat ever and does not notice. graystripe likes firestar when he's his deputy, and when he's so loyal he leaves riverclan for him. firestar doesn't so much have a crush of ravenpaw as see him catch an adder and goes "oh, that's attractive." anyway that was a tangent, back to what i was talking about before

gender roles are something i'm not quite sure how to approach, because the gender roles in the books are so incredibly informed by our human gender roles, and honestly the books are quite often misogynistic. the only really significant difference in a clan society, where almost everyone does the same job, is whether you can mother kits or not. i think that is really important in clan society and i want to have distinct gender roles that i can explore, but i also don't want to fall into the traps that the erins fall into over and over of relegating female characters to motherhood and caregiver roles only, and giving them nurturing personalities because the female cats are only there to be mothers. that shouldn't be the case, and i definitely am changing a lot of that, but i am not really sure how to go about it yet. we'll see.

also these cats need some sex ed

[sybaritick]

and speaking of year-end roundups, one of the things ik i am associated with on here is the kink concept posts. here are 10 from 2024! you can now vote on your favorite! (which i would like to expand into a little original-work oneshot!)

building better catboys / our pretentious designer breed Anyway I totally shouldn't talk about this here but some catfolk protection NGO sent us one of those lawyer threat form letters because of the non-domestic feline intermixture and some unapproved genemods the shop did for us for some neuro and behavioral stuff. I chucked the first one assuming they weren't serious and they sent another that seems a little more concerning but I doubt they'll really do anything. Anything the shop did is gonna get approved in another 5 years I'm sure and if they don't it's because of the hybrid personhood lobby as usual. They sent a letter here addressed to her too, which is hilarious, but obviously I just kept it. I mean she'd understand it if she read it but I don't think she would really get the extent to which it's pure propaganda. They wanna recruit these hybrids as easily-led sympathetic mouthpieces to parrot their own viewpoint-- you know how it is. She deserves better than being used as somebody's pawn.

we really ought to sexualize transition more and that he's horny all the time from the testosterone ofc. horny/hungry/sweaty/face down rutting his sensitive little tdick against a pillow feeling the increasing pudginess of his belly squished up against the mattress

solarpunk girlfriend parts 1/2/3 accepting the Most Boringly Het-Brained Man On Tumblr award for the first example of something sexy I can think of being "woman wearing a sundress," then immediately having to forfeit the award due to subsequent explanation that I find the deficiencies and elisions in her politics sexually attractive because they are exploitable

updates on your cyborg girlfriend tbh if you have a robot or sufficiently-cyborg girlfriend and you're not regularly trying to get in there to get finer-tuned control I think you're doing her a disservice. if it is at all possible for someone to mind-control her they eventually will. take on this responsibility yourself and get there first.

mothboy colonialism the jewel of the collection is the mothboy mounted to the back wall, shackled behind the plexiglass with their hands above their head to better display the musculature of the specimen. a short heavy chain hangs between the leg irons, almost touching the polished wood beneath; the diaphanous wings are spread wide and pinned back with two dozen long t-pins, arranged precisely as not to obscure the view of them.

Click here to disobey. do you see how it erodes the capacity for genuine dissent? do you see how reinforcing the lesson that you can Choose Disobedience, Click Here is a wonderful way of capturing more and more of the energy and organization that could otherwise be used to do things that might actually loosen your grip? to narrow their perception of viable methods of escape to a tactic that will leave them marked and isolated and digestible? does it turn you on?

cal's take on the "drug that makes you fat" feedism trope anyway 'ts like catnip to her. who would not daydream about declawing him and keeping him as a trophy. he's soooo paranoid about accidentally taking a good few doses of this little concoction in his food. it's not like it'll make you forget about this little crusade! at worst you'll put on a few pounds and find yourself with a bit more of a french fry habit. what's the harm, hm? is it really worth being such a conspiracist? sorry, with a schedule like hers the only time she's available to talk this week is for a lunch meeting, but she knows a good place...

rabbitgirl considers collaborating with the occupiers She was raised with the standards that rabbits should be slender and quiet and quick, none of which she has ever met, even in childhood. But by the weasels that remain to keep order she is constantly singled out for jealousy-inducing special treatment; she luxuriates in being the one who is always afforded extra food or leniency or the clothes and jewelry of the invaders that fancy themselves their new masters, the vole-pelt cloak and the heavy wool skirt with its gleaming brass buttons and promises to keep her warm through the coming winter.

forcefem admin friendly good-cop admin at the forcefem reeducation facility who has a lighter touch censoring your letters home and lets you sneak in your silly masculine action movies and nods along when you insist you'll never submit but does record it all in your file just so i can let medical know which of you needs a little extra pharmaceutical attention

"deradicalization" i really have to eventually write some horror-adjacent ""deradicalization"" fic because I have thought about it a few too many times. i would have to put a bit of thought into what sort of political angle i want to come at it from, because while the obvious choice is overt fascism i think this could be a lot more interesting if it's not all that different from a modern liberal democracy. you do not need to look very hard to find some insane things the FBI has done infiltrating leftist organizations/COINTELPRO/etc. following some sort of major domestic unrest i think throwing a bunch of only tangentially involved blue-haired college students and disaffected youths at some sort of pseudo-mandatory (ie: not literally mandatory because that brings a court case upon you, but something like your driver's license or returning to college for the college kids is gated behind it) """therapy""" intended to remove them from the "cult" they have gotten themselves into.

[bestworstcase]

Any headcanons on what zodiacs people on Remnant might use? I can definitely see there being a Grimm or dust based zodiac tbh

well......

...there's twelve stories in fairytales of remnant, and ozpin WOULD be the type of person who included one story he associated with each zodiac sign to symbolize unity, or whatever, because THE MAN LOVES HIS SYMBOLS... so for time does this!remnant i just picked an image for each 30° division that seemed like ozpin would go "that reminds me of this story" about, in order:

#1: the warrior in the woods - the sickle. in the story, the warrior carries a billhook, which is also a curved agricultural tool.

#2: the man who stared at the sun - the rose. a rose symbolically suggests both beauty (the flower) and adversity (the thorns), which seems apropos for a fable about a farmer sacrificing his eyesight to win the sun's blessing.

#3: the shallow sea - the shell. there's a neat illustration of a shell in the story, shells also suggest the sea, and the narrative is symbolically about people "coming out of their shells," so to speak, to find their true selves.

#4: the hunter's children - the hunter. needs no explanation.

#5: the indecisive king - monarch. the actual constellation looks like a crown, and i imagine it's sometimes named "the crown" instead, but i think oz would prefer "the monarch" because talking about crowns makes him nervous. anyway, this one also needs no explanation.

#6: the grimm child - the witch. ozpin like "don't ask me about this one."

#7: the judgment of faunus - the chimera. i imagine the constellation is also sometimes called "the lion" or "the scorpion," because it resembles both depending on how you look at it, but most split the difference to call it "the chimera." this association would probably get ozpin side-eyed by fauni in the room.

#8: the infinite man - the knight. like the monarch, the constellation is also called "the sword" pretty commonly, but oz prefers "the knight." whether he's relating the infinite man or the enemy leader to the knight is perhaps unclear even to him.

#9: the two brothers - the serpent. the punchline is that people who worship the god of darkness with any seriousness stress ozpin out.

#10: the story of the seasons - the hermit. i like to think there's a version of this fairytale where the four maidens lift their old friend's soul into the sky after he passes away, so the constellation is actually for real associated with the story, but ozpin doesn't like That version because it strikes just a little too close to home with the eternal guardian thing.

#11: the girl in the tower - the tower. i think it would be funny if this were ozpin's birth sign.

#12: the gift of the moon - the sparrow. because mar (the large original moon) has, you know, a gigantic crater in it i like to think that there are a lot of myths around the world to the tune of it either being a HUGE MOUTH or a GATE TO THE AFTERLIFE or a NEST, PERHAPS OF A COSMIC BIRD and that got me to "there's a version of this story where the sun is a sparrow and the moon is its sparrow-pot" because, why not.

[milestonekestrel]

Sending Him for the character ask. Go on, we all know you want to.

YES I DOOOOOOO

Favorite thing about him:

What’s the nicest way to say everything. NO JUST KIDDING but I adore this man. He’s not perfect but he is everything. I mean I made the guy up 😼😼 so I would know /lh ANYWAY my favorite thing? Just how HEAD OVER HEELS he gets for his wives. And his design I also rly rly love drawing him.

Least favorite thing about him:

Politely. He is a bit of a cunt 🫠 I know WHY but also like. Man. Why did bro SAY all that. You do NOT call a man’s wife a slut like that 😭

Favorite line:

Bro does not say anything 😭😭😭😭😭 I do like when I get to write him talking about birds though.

BROTP:

Erm. Billy and Roy! I think they're very cool. Roy the wingman of all time.

OTP:

CAZSUZEBILLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I also like Billy n Kieran but. Ough my guys.

NOTP:

Who else does he interact with bruh 😭 idk man. Billy and the fucking bitch in the locker room that tried to beat him up in school. There.

Random Headcanon:

Bro feels like he gets very into books. Hes not an avid reader but yknow. If hes reading you will KNOW (type of guy to go “NO!!! WHAT!!!” At a plot twist just rly loud out of nowhere. Also does this to movies n things)

Unpopular Opinion:

What constitutes a popular option about this guy. Erm idk. He didn't completely deserve to be hospitalized? Like of course bro should NOT have said all that and I mean. yeah he fucked up there. but Caz.... man.. you did not have to almost kill him.

Song I associate with him:

omggggg there's SO MANY where do I begin. first off, probably ever will wood song ever tbh. I will make it all work. But to give you non will wood ones this time?

Favorite picture of him:

we outta peas

[efingart]

Hi You're very open to the Black Ops series and I wanted to know, by curiosity, if there's anything canon in the series that you wish didn't happen (not taking BO4 into account, it never happened), like a detail about a character, relationships, events, etc...

Oh my gosh! Great question! I think most of what I'd like to change about canon would be what I wish they had added. But I still have a few moments I'd like removed.

My big canon-changing one is:

Bowman's death. I realize he's very dead. There was a part of me for a while that just wanted to say fuck canon, maybe he was just injured, they got him out somehow. I really liked Bowman and I just think he deserved an "I lived bitch" moment.

Also there are things I'd like removed that I think fanon took too far.

One would be Woods' infamous Cold War onion line. A simple search would reveal that "knowing your onions" was a common turn of phrase for someone of that generation. But also in a room that at least had to have a couple Millenials in it, the Shrek association ALONE should have killed that line. And I didn't even GET that line the first time I played through. So the fact that it's random out of three or four things he could say makes it more aggravating. It's so stupid and it's so extra aggravating that people use it to portray Woods as a goofball idiot.

Another would be the tree-climbing scene in Black Ops 2. I hate how ONE SCENE has completely painted Mason as a bad dad. And no I don't think you should yell at your children. But there are so many factors in play there. I legit have had to stop myself from writing essays about it because I really could. It's one scene of a grieving father and son trying to get used to each other. Their relationship is tense because Alex was on the road a lot. Alex is trying to make sure that his kid is able to take care of himself (because people keep dying around him, HELLO). Oh my god here I go again. I'm not doing this 😂 So yeah I'd rather have it nixed than have to look at surface level takes about it. (tbh I'd rather have more father son scenes to balance it out but it's CoD and that's as about as domestic as it's gonna get).

Also Bell's legends line. Jesus Christ. That's not canon. If there's one thing in Black Ops that's not canon it's that stupid line. And the onion one. (As far as JWIN goes it's Bell teasing Frank because well... if you know anything about Chapter 7 well then you know)

[katyspersonal]

A couple more thoughts on Daughters of Dark, or Dark in general

It feels consistent that they oddly prefer to wear white (mostly) clothing, despite being associated with the Dark! Flower Skirt might have been Elana's originally since she naturally has floral aesthetic and Daughters of Dark "just arrive" in the kingdoms seeking to seduce the most powerful person around... and Flower Skirt's description says exactly this, that it is cute clothing designed with attracting a potential "patron" in mind! Needless to mention it is found in Shulva!

Besides Daughters of Dark, Velka is another example of a Dark-aligned being that wears white:

This all just starts to feel more intentional for me tbh! I think beings of Dark, or those heavily aligned with it, instinctively lean towards wearing white clothes to appear "safer" and more.. likeable, I suppose? They know, at least deep down, that everyone fears/hates the Dark, and it motivates them to seek "blending in" and obscuring the darkness, even if in the most superficial way x)

Some just want to have a more "inviting" look in the society that loathes Dark, others might hate themselves and let it rub onto them, some maybe were pressured to wear white (like I can picture Velka wearing white reluctantly). Also imagine Manus not being allowed to appear amongst the other Lords unless he's wearing a white dress and some people embarrassing the hell out of him and Gwyn by joking he must be yet another one of Gwyn's brides fjdhjfdfdh

Another interesting thing is like, I feel like my hunch about Priscilla being connected with the Dark was right! Alsanna is associated with ice/snow and invisibility, whereas Nashandra's true form is just a lot of death quite literally... and these things DO also manifest in Priscilla! Her element is cold and ice, she can turn invisible and she is "antithesis to all life" that also carries literal scythe, weapon symbolic of death!

Since she was discarded at birth for being seen as a threat to all life, these traits must have shown initially rather than just be something from Velka rubbed onto her I think! I still like the idea that Priscilla is a cuck child between Seath and Caitha (a God aligned not just with Dark but also with death!) while Gwyn wasn't looking though fdgsgd But at this rate the idea of Velka being her biological mother isn't that far-stretched xD In either case, Everlasting Dragons aren't linked to Death, so if Priscilla points towards Dark, that'd come from second parent 🤔 It all makes sense, too! In the world of Fire+Life+Light, Ice+Death+Dark are its opposites, everything is very balanced! Death-associated places and Darkness also always come hand in hand in Dark Souls, too!

At the same time, Elana and Nadalia are interestingly reflections of different flow in time! Elana's element is wood in the world where everything that didn't come from Dragons came from the trees! "Tame" Humanity, that isn't wild, manifests as wood (Four Kings are the quickest example), but also Giants in Dark Souls 2 are devolving back into wooden forms. Wood reflects devolution, coming back in the past! Meanwhile, Nadalia's element is ash, which is the opposite; ash is what is left after everything burnt, in the world that holds itself on a lot of burning. It is future and eventual decay it brings. Both likewise oppose what Age(s) of Fire entail, just in different ways: undoing it or exhausting it respectively 🤔 When elements of Alsanna and Nashandra (ice and death) are more directly "hostile" to it!

[wackpedion]

i know you're gonna get like 10 million seth asks for the ask game so i'm gonna send in dipper pines instead!!!

DIPPERRRRR ouhhhh I love him so much. ok so from this ask game:

favorite thing about them

Can I just say everything??? Idk he's just. such a silly. just a boy. He loves his sister, is anxiety riddled and insecure, very trans and autistic, a bright and curious kid, he's just amazing overall. He does has his flaws but that just adds to his lovable charm, like he's just a kid!!! ofc he'll be selfish and get up to trouble, and I wholly support it !

least favorite thing about them

Nothing. His crush on Wendy does make me cringe a bit but its ok I forgive him.

favorite line

CAN I SAY THE LAST LINE OF THE SERIES I think it was the last I don't remember. It's so good pulls at my heart. "If you've ever taken a road trip through the Pacific Northwest, you've probably seen a bumper sticker for a place called Gravity Falls. It's not on any maps and most people have never heard of it. Some people think it's a myth. But if you're curious, don't wait. Take a trip. Find it. It's out there, somewhere in the woods... waiting."

also one of the Funny Lines that come to mind is "Pacific is the worst! And I'm not just saying that out of the jealousy, I would say it to her face." [Cue Dipper opening the door to Pacifica] "You're the worst." [Slams door]

brOTP

FORD well it's more familial but I think it counts. Their relationship as uncle and nephew is sososoo important to me... Them both being nerds, how Dipper looks up to Ford and want's to be like him, the obvious parallels drawn between the sets of twins in general. Ughhhh. If we're going for a more strictly defined Friend relationship tho ermmm idk .the thing with Gravity Falls is that there's a lack of characters around Mabels and Dippers age, and the ones that exist tend to serve as antagonists

OTP

DIPCIFICAAAA not like there's many other options, as stated above. but still ughhhh they're so cute Northwest Manor Mystery ☹☹☹☹ The episode of all time. It was so cute and nice to see Pacifica show a softer side and prove herself as more than just a rich girl stereotype

nOTP

None really, theres nothing I'm particularly averse to. I suppose Candy and Dipper? Although I haven't seen many if any people actually ship that. Oh actually Wendipper I Can't with LMAO. First of all Dipper is too cringefail, second of all not fond of the age gap, third of all I just can't see Wendy being into him like Please. oh also not a big fan of Pinecest. ok seems like I Was able to turn up nOTPs lmfao

random headcanon

gonna make one up rn He's what I call conditionally ambidextrous, like me! Basically he naturally uses his left hand for certain things, and his right for others. Also that he'll need/get glasses as he grows up :3

unpopular opinion

I am wholly indifferent to billdip and IDC if people ship it, It's not my business what other people do with their pixels. and tbh the themes of manipulation and a power dynamic can be interesting when explored a certain way

song i associate with them

Oh I haven't thought about this.... gimme a moment... ermm Puppet Boy by DEVO? Cuz of that one episode lmao

favorite picture of them

I am not in a place to go through episodes and take screenshots (I am in class) so I am just going off of what turns up on google

This is SUCH a cool shot, the whole sequence of Bill coming into scene in general was so creative and amazing. And it comes from my favourite episode <3

Also idk if this counts but, Bipper <3 what a silly guy

[theboombutton]

Spoilers Ahead

OK let's talk about the lore implications of The Magnus Protocol episode 4's statement.

Timeframe

The Mannheim School was founded in 1741-1742; and the Royal Court of the Palatinate left Mannheim in 1778. This gives us a roughly 35-year timeframe within which which our violinist could have made his initial carriage journey to Germany - barring timeline differences.

This absolutely destroys my theory that the Fears arrived here from the TMA universe, found a universe without Fear, and broke through in East Germany during the Cold War. This episode firmly establishes that there were Fears in the Protocolverse in the late 18th century, and that they were well-established at the time - established enough to have a guy giving out cursed artifacts in the woods of Baden.

Were they the Archiverse Fears, that just happened to arrive earlier than I thought? Were they Protocolverse Fears? Were they Fears from yet another universe, escaped from their own Fearpocalypse?

The Fears

So this is a really fascinating statement because it seems to marry our old friend TMA Slaughter Classic, with whatever the fuck Ink5oul was doing in TMAGP episode 2, with just a mention of the Archivist-associated power to elicit an unintended confession.

The Slaughter connection I'm sure I won't have to argue - it's straight out of TMA. In fact, it's so straight-out-of-TMA that to me it suggests that this is almost certainly the Archiverse's The Slaughter. If we were dealing with an artifact of a different universe's Fear of violence, I wouldn't expect it to be so connected to music. There's nothing about music that inherently connects it to horrific violence, and yet Bardwell jumps out of a carriage and dashes his skull on the rocks because of what seems an awful lot like the Piper's Song. Violin Audrey Two goes full Grifter's Bone when it's unable to get blood.

The interesting part though is that these incidents are the exception to the rule of the violin's favor. At first it seems happy to make small, flesh wound mutilations of its player, which doesn't sound like the Slaughter at all. Yes, he moves on to serial killing, but it's a very methodical, planned kind of violence - not at all what I'd expect from the Archiverse Slaughter. And the theme of an artist mutilating themselves in service of their art seems very similar to Daria in Protocol episode 2.

Of course, the art connection might just be a coincidence. There is a disproportionate amount of art about art and artists, just because it's high on the list of things artists tend to think about. It's the same reason there's not a whole lot of art about septic tank maintenance*.

I doubt it, though.

Here's my working theory: I think there are at least two universes' Fears at work here, and there wasn't enough room in the Fear-Space for two full sets of entities to represent and feed on essentially the same fears. So they got smooshed together.

The Archiverse Slaughter got smooshed with a close equivalent - a fear that included Archiverse-style violence, yes, but also included a significant element of self-harm, and was culturally wrapped up with artistic performance in the same way that the Archiverse Slaughter was wrapped up with the sound, but not always the performance, of music. The Smooshed Slaughter teeters between its aspects, showing one face or the other depending upon the situation.

OK but what was with the Archivist powers?

idk tbh. I can think of two theories, neither of which I find particularly compelling:

The guy in the woods wasn't actually an avatar. Instead, he was a Salesa type, a distributor of supernatural trinkets. He had some kind of artifact of the Eye on him that gave him archivist compulsion powers.

All of the Archiverse Entities were changed by their time under the rule of the Eye, so being strongly-enough touched by an Archiverse Fear gives you mild Eye Powers for free.

Augustus

Yes I know everyone thinks this is Jonah, and I admit there is a good chance it is Jonah. But I don't like it, and I hold out hope that it isn't.

Personally, I like the idea that the Fears were specifically attached to the voices that told the stories in TMA, in which case Jonah wouldn't have been dragged along; but, if it was based purely on the physical presence of the people in the top room of the Panopticon, then yes, Jonah could have been brought along. To our knowledge nobody ever went after Jonah's body down in the labyrinth, so his eyes would presumably have been left alive in Elias's head for like, the whole episode.

I still hold out hope that Augustus is an Archivist-equivalent from another universe that also went Fearpocalypse and also released its Fears to the multiverse. While I'm pretty certain we're dealing with two sets of Fears here, possibly combined into one set of Smooshed Fears, I'm not at all certain that the non-Archiverse Fears are originally from the Protocolverse.

Conclusion

It's 3 AM and I have to go to bed. I think I've properly scheduled this to post an hour after the episode drops; if I'm wrong about the episode timing and accidentally spoil someone, I'm very sorry.

---

* yes I know there's septic tank dive fetish photos, I said "not a whole lot" not "none whatsoever."

[lusthurts]

Fun question for you:

Let's assume that all of the Warblers of the HBWB universe were into Taylor Swift, what would be their favorite albums for each of them in your opinion? (I know that the story technically is placed in the 10s, but you can choose any album by her).

omg I love this question so much! and thank god I don't have to choose from only albums before like 2012 because I would not get very far

I will in fact have thorough explanations for all of them sorry in advance

Blaine - I think 1989! My gut was to say Speak Now because it's my favorite album, but I think Blaine is much more a fan of pop music than the alt rock/pop country vibe that Speak Now has. I think he would love that it's a very fun, upbeat album that still has some really hard hitting songs on it. I think his favorite would probably be "Out of the Woods," "Clean," or "Style." He 100% would have a soft spot for the All Too Well 10 minute version though, and any song she plays on the piano would make him also want to learn to play it. TBH I think he would just really vibe with the sad breakup songs in general as well, like he definitely loves "Last Kiss", "exile", and "Forever & Always (piano version)". And he would kill it on the piano to "The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived" post Klaine breakup.

Sebastian - I know it would be either Folklore or Evermore (this might be a controversial take idk) and it's because I think writer/reader Sebastian would really appreciate the songwriting on those albums. I think he probably would've been one of the Taylor fans that wasn't super into her/didn't care much until those albums dropped during the pandemic, and now he has a super deep appreciation for her songwriting talents. This would change if you asked me on any given day, but I think his favorite songs would be "cowboy like me," "the last great american dynasty", "peace", "illicit affairs", and "champagne problems". In terms of aesthetic, I think he probably likes TTPD the most...a lot of the songs on that album would probably be favorites for him too.

Jeff - I think Speak Now is for sure his favorite, but he also loves Lover and the love songs on Reputation. Like, I think he's particularly drawn to songs like "King of My Heart", "Cornelia Street", "Delicate", and "Call It What You Want". The reason I still think Speak Now is his favorite because I think it is the most cohesively relatable album to him plus it's the genre of music he likes the most with its more pop rock type vibe. It has the perfect balance of heavy angst like "Dear John" that he would love to belt out while sobbing in the car when he's in a really bad place with Nick, happy love songs like "Sparks Fly" that really appease the rom com lover in him, and songs that tell beautiful stories of far away places that he can use for escapism like "Enchanted" and "Long Live." I think he would realllyyyy love the vault tracks, and he definitely spent a whole night sobbing when he heard "Foolish One" for the first time. I could honestly see "Timeless" becoming the song he most associates with Nick.

Nick - I think Midnights? The only Taylor song on my Nick playlist at the time of writing this is "Anti-Hero" and I think that's probably his favorite song of hers. I just know he was LIVING when that song came out. I honestly just see him vibing to the upbeat pop songs on that album a lot, especially "Bejeweled", "Karma", "Midnight Rain", and "Paris." And he would've loved seeing "Vigilante Shit" on the Eras Tour. I think other song favorites for Nick would be all the singles from 1989 ("Blank Space" specifically), "Down Bad", "We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together", and "Cruel Summer." He just strikes me as someone who would know a lot of Taylor's music and still choose the most popular singles over the more niche song choices.

Trent - I think Trent is a Red swiftie. The release of Red TV was a cultural moment to him (as it was for everyone) and he was 100% driving to Starbucks the next morning to get the taylatte, staying up all night to watch her Jimmy Fallon appearance, throwing a party to celebrate her appearing on SNL, and everything else that came along with it. I think he likes a lot of Taylor's music, but Red just feels like such a moment to him that he can't pick anything else. He is probably the biggest fan of the ATW 10 minute version but I think he also vibes with the lesser known tracks on Red like "Starlight" and "I Almost Do." He is certainly a "Girl At Home" apologist and will die on the hill that "State of Grace" is the best track 1. I think the vault tracks almost reinvented the album for him, and he particularly loves "Nothing New."

Meatbox - I think he's a country music fan, and my gut is to say Fearless. I could see this man rocking out to "Our Song" but nothing else on debut, and I think Red & Speak Now are both more emotional albums than what he'd like. I think he'd be one of those athletes who if asked his favorite song would probably say "You Belong With Me" and say it in the way that's like "what's the song that goes she wears short skirts, I wear t-shirts" or whatever lol. He would definitely also like all the sports metaphor songs, like "The Alchemy" and "So High School" and he'd probably vibe with "Love Story" and "Mr. Perfectly Fine." He also is probably one of those guys who's like, I'm a feminist, I know all the words to "The Man."

Ethan - okay I think he would reallyyyy vibe with TTPD during his breakup era. Like those songs are some of the most heartbreaking breakup songs of all time. Specifically want to call out "Peter", "loml", "The Black Dog", "So Long London", and "How Did It End?" for this purpose. I think he would love the singles on 1989 (probably the era he became a Taylor fan) and the music videos from the Midnights era. He also would have a soft spot for the love songs on TTPD and specifically "The Alchemy" and "So High School." For some reason I think he really would like "Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus" but I cannot articulate why.

Thad - I mean I have in fact made it canon that Thad pretty much exclusively listens to white rappers which is such random lore lmao but makes me laugh every time I think about it. I do think he'd really vibe with "End Game" and "Bad Blood" because of the rap elements. He's probably pretty similar to Meatbox in that he likes the singles a lot, but I think if asked his favorite song he'd probably try to pull out something super niche to try to impress people. Maybe "hoax"? idk that is the first song that came to mind while thinking of Thad for some reason.

Wes - I think TTPD with a soft spot for earlier albums, specifically Fearless. Idk if this is just because while I'm typing this part "The Tortured Poets Department" is playing, but I really could see him liking that song a lot and the love songs on this album. His girlfriend at NYU is definitely a swiftie, and I could see him getting a lot more into her because of his girlfriend. I guess I kinda associate the later albums with that idea because obviously there are a lot of people who are just discovering how good her music is now because of girlfriends, sisters, friends, etc. I think he'd also like the drama of "thanK you aIMee" and the edits to "The Prophecy."

David - 1989 for sure...I just see him as someone who likes pop music and I think he considers this the pop bible. tbh I have given this man basically zero character development lol but I do know he plays soccer in the fall and tennis in the spring, is on the debate team, and ends up going to Northwestern. I think he would really vibe with upbeat songs for that reason, but unlike the other 1989 fans, he would probably be more into the songs like "I Wish You Would", "I Know Places", and "All You Had To Do Was Stay".

Hunter - I lowkey feel like he'd be a Taylor hater lol I hate to say it...he only listens to songs by men lmao. But I think he can get behind some of the songs on Reputation.

Emma - I think she was probably a late swiftie who was ashamed of liking her when she was younger because mean girls thought it was trendy to make fun of Taylor Swift so she didn't want to admit she likes her. So the vault tracks + newer albums would particularly hit for her. "The Bolter" is a very Emma coded song, and she feels silly about it, but Ethan thinks "When Emma Falls in Love" was literally written about her. I can see her vibing with some of the slower songs that aren't love songs, like "Bigger Than The Whole Sky", "Ronan", and "epiphany", maybe because she hates being happy lmao

Hattie - her favorite is definitely Reputation. She loves that it's an album of love songs in disguise. I think she can get really hyped up by "...Ready For It?", "Don't Blame Me", "Dress", and "Dancing With Our Hands Tied". Unrelated, but I think her outfit for the Eras Tour would've been the swimsuit fit from the "You Need to Calm Down" music video - the one where she has the pink fur coat and the bedazzled sunglasses and the martini.

Dylan - I kinda think debut? no one knows this because I never included it anywhere in the fic but Dylan pretty much just lives with his mom and his sister, and I think they're both huge swifties that indoctrinated him. I think he was probably a day 1 swiftie and like...this album got him through his parents divorce lol. He likes to flex on people that he knew her when, and he tries to pull out songs no one else knows. Favorites would be "A Place in this World", "I'm Only Me When I'm With You", "Cold As You", and "Tied Together With A Smile."

James - Speak Now! I think this character is a lot like Blaine in a lot of ways. He's a bit of a romantic but is kinda just messy and figuring himself out. Like, he had a crush on Blaine, fully slept with Sebastian, and then spent sooo long pining for Trent. He would like the ups and downs of Speak Now and particularly vibe with songs that take him kind of out of this world, like "Castles Crumbling", "Mine", and "Enchanted" and songs that are way too real like "Never Grow Up". I also think he really likes "Electric Touch".

Kurt - I think he'd be kinda pretentious about Taylor and would pick something that makes him seem more refined...idk I'm leaning toward Folklore? I'm going with this because I think he'd really relate to songs like "mirrorball", "this is me trying", "cardigan", and "mad woman". If Taylor's music ever gets turned into a musical or if she ever writes a musical, he would eat that up.

omg that was so much I'm sorry lmao this was the greatest question of all time